Coffee with the health care marketing girls.

In case you haven’t noticed, every health care center within a hundred miles wants YOU. Advertising for patients is good business for creatives. We lure them with that enticing, original promise of “compassionate care from a dedicated and experienced team of professionals”. Because that’s what the health care marketing girls, hired by the doctors and the hospital bean counters want them to tell us to say.

We do a lot of health care advertising in Hooterville. Recently, I met for coffee with health care marketing girls from competing entities who share a campus. They decided it would be smart to combine their resources and tell everyone there’s no reason to go to the big city…all the health care you could ever want is right here. It’s all here … in Hooterville. No brain surgery, but just about everything else. They told me that their Doctors (ie, Bosses) from BOTH places had instructed them the commercial must mention both facilities equally, mention all the services and procedures they both offer, how they have all the best equipment and latest technology, how doctors from all over the country are flocking to Hooterville to practice and live because the quality of life is so wonderful, and not forget to mention how qualified, experienced, well trained, caring, compassionate, dedicated and professional their entire staff is…including housekeeping and security.   

I know a setup for failure when I hear one.

I told them I would like to meet with their Boss Doctors. At the meeting I would provide the following demonstration: I’ll bring a gallon of water and an 8 ounce glass. I’ll pour all of the water out of gallon jug into the glass.

It’s impossible. And so is what you’re asking.

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2 Responses to “Coffee with the health care marketing girls.”

  1. Muonwar Says:

    Brilliant chickie, just brilliant! The gallon jug example will be copied throughout the universe… tell ’em that even down in Hooterville we know a hole when we see one.

  2. George Parker Says:

    Adchick… Having worked on my share of health care advertising over the years. You are dead right in everything you say. Which means Dr Douchenozzle would sit through your demo. look at you, and say “So?” All he can think of is golf and a new BMW. I have a whole chapter on Healthcare/drug/insurance advertising in The Ubiquitous Persuaders. Should be out in three weeks. I think you’ll enjoy it. ‘Cos I am a fucking Prince. Glad you like the picture.
    Cheers/George

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